Many gay couples negotiate open relationships

We have always known that legalizing homosexual "marriage" would do more than just allow homosexuals to marry. It would completely redefine marriage.

A new study of 566 gay couples in the San Francisco area reveals that HIV prevention should include gay men in so-called committed, long term relationships because most of them have agreed that it's healthy, and good for the relationship, to have sex on the side.

Now you know the real meaning behind the phrase "two loving individuals in a long term, committed relationship."

San Francisco Chronicle
Merridith May
July 16, 2010
They call them "San Francisco relationships."

"A term coined by the local gay community, it's defined as two men in a long-term open relationship, with lovers on the side.

A new study released this week by the Center for Research on Gender & Sexuality at San Francisco State University put statistics around what gay men already know: Many Bay Area boyfriends negotiate open relationships that allow for sex with outsiders.

After studying the sexual patterns of 566 gay male couples from the Bay Area for three years, lead researcher Colleen Hoff found that gay men negotiate ground rules and open their relationships as a way to build trust and longevity in their partnerships.

"I don't own my lover, and I don't own his body," he said. "I think it's weird to ask someone you love to give up that part of their life. I would never do it."

"So much of the HIV prevention effort is aimed at a different set - men in dance clubs or bathhouses having anonymous sex," she said. "HIV prevention might want to expand its message to address relationships; we have to look at risk in a greater context."

In her study of gay couples, 47 percent reported open relationships. Forty-five percent were monogamous, and the remaining 8 percent disagreed about what they were."

Read more...

U of MN official program calls for challenging white privilege, universal health care, abortion rights, living wages, and same sex marriage

Here's an email message put out by Anne Phibbs, Director of the GLBTA (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Ally) Programs Office at the University of Minnesota. The official pro-homosexual advocacy program of the University of Minnesota subsidized with our taxpayer dollars.

The tag line at the bottom of the statement, highlights the Leftist ideological bent of the group, e.g. "We recognize the intersections of gender and sexuality with race, ethnicity, class, ability, ability, age, culture, and all social systems; we are committed to holding ourselves ad others accountable for working against all forms of oppression." Oppression?

In her email letter, Ms. Phibbs calls for her and her fellow GLBTA allies to "Be out and proud and visible -- as a progressive queer/GLBTA movement..."

She notes that she's going to attend an Anti-Proposition 8 rally "as a representative of the thousands and millions of queer and GLBTA activists who understand that our agenda is as much about challenging white privilege, ending gender and sexual violence, creating access for people with disabilities, and ensuring universal health care, access to education, reproductive rights, and living wages - as it is about same sex marriage."

That's quite an agenda for an official program of the University of Minnesota.

"Challenging white oppression." Sounds like U of M President Bruininks might be in trouble.

"Ensuring universal health care"...by the government I'm sure. That's an expensive and controversial proposal.

"Reproductive rights." I didn't realize the University of Minnesota was taking sides in the abortion debate.

"Living wage." What would that mean for the millions of lower wage earners who would lose their jobs?

And of course, last but not least is "same sex marriage." This sounds like the University of Minnesota is in the vanguard of the sexual revolution.

With the state facing the prospect of a several billion dollar budget deficit and the University of Minnesota certain to call for more state tax dollars, I think the the legislature and the governor's office should take a closer look at how the University of Minnesota is spending the money it already receives from the state before making new legislative appropriations to the University of Minnesota.

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GLBTA Programs Office E-Blast Friday, November 14, 2008 Bridging Our Communities Considering Tomorrow's Protests As many of you know by now, tomorrow will be a national day of action for GLBT rights, with protests planned across the country. Information about the protests planned for Minnesota are included at the end of this email. This day of action has grown out of anger and frustration over the passage of Proposition 8 in California and other anti-GLBT legislation in Arizona, Arkansas and Florida. Here at the U of M today, I have spoken with students, colleagues and community members who plan to attend the protests because they are angered by the loss of same sex marriage rights. And I have spoken with others who will not attend, in part because they are frustrated with an organized GLBTA movement that seems to take same sex marriage rights as the primary focal point of its political agenda. In weighing my options, I've decided to attend tomorrow both because I am angry about Proposition 8 and other measures around the country - and because I know that same sex marriage rights cannot be our focus as a movement. I want to attend tomorrow as a representative of the thousands and millions of queer and GLBTA activists who understand that our agenda is as much about challenging white privilege, ending gender and sexual violence, creating access for people with disabilities, and ensuring universal health care, access to education, reproductive rights, and living wages - as it is about same sex marriage. Now, more than ever, we need to be out and proud and visible - as a progressive queer/GLBTA movement that rejects the simplistic politics of separation and division. In support of that vision, I offer here some text from an open letter to the community by organizations involved in the No on 8 effort. This letter addresses some of the painful discussion that is occurring in our communities around who "caused" the defeat of Proposition 8. Please take a moment to read this letter, and to work against a simplistic analysis pitting "the GLBT community" against "the African American community." We are not two distinct communities, but one human community made up of many identities, faiths, beliefs and worldviews. It is my hope that the passage of Proposition 8 can serve as a catalyst - to get us sharing our stories and experiences with people we've not yet talked with. The full text can be found at: http://www.thetaskforce.org/activist_center/take_action "It is natural to analyze what went wrong. But in recent days there has been a tendency to assign blame to specific communities, in particular, the African American community. The fact is, 52 percent of all Californians, the vast majority of whom were not African Americans, voted against us. In addition, the most recent analysis of the exit poll that drove much of this speculation determined that it was too small to draw any conclusion on the African American vote, and further polling shows that the margin was much closer than first reported. Most importantly, though, none of this discourse changes the outcome of the vote. It only serves to divide our community and hinder our ability to create a stronger and more diverse coalition to help us overturn Proposition 8 and restore full equality and human rights to LGBT people. It also deflects responsibility from the group that is responsible for this miscarriage of justice: The Yes on 8 campaign. They waged a deceitful and immoral campaign that brought about this violation of our human rights and dignity." In hope and struggle, Anne Phibbs Director, GLBTA Programs Office The following area protests are being staged on Saturday, November 15: • Minneapolis: 12:30 p.m. assembly at Hennepin County Government Center, 315 South 5th Street • Saint Paul: 3:00 p.m. assembly at State Capitol, 75 Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Boulevard • Duluth/Superior: 12:00 p.m. assembly at MN Power Plaza, Lake Avenue and Superior Street • Fargo/Moorhead: 12:00 p.m. assembly at Fargo (west) side of the Veterans Memorial Bridge on Main Avenue For more information: National Day of Action Minnesota Events Details About the GLBTA Programs Office The Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Ally Programs Office is dedicated to improving campus climate for all University of Minnesota students, staff, faculty, alumni, and visitors by developing and supporting more inclusive understandings of gender and sexuality. We recognize the intersections of gender and sexuality with race, ethnicity, class, ability, age, culture, and all social systems; we are committed to holding ourselves and others accountable for working against all forms of oppression. The GLBTA Programs Office seeks to bridge and build communities that create affirming and welcoming environments in which people can be their whole selves and which honor all identities and experiences. To contact the GLBTA Programs Office, please call 612-625-0537, email us, or visit our website.

This e-mail was sent to ... by the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Ally Programs Office at the University of Minnesota, 138 Klaeber Court, 320 16th Ave SE, Minneapolis, MN 55455. To stop receiving this e-mail communication, click here to opt-out.